Storm Warning ?

It's very calm and quiet nowadays. My life. Mostly filled with routine and other regular stuff. Music, DVDs, games, hanging out with mates. Nothing exciting at all.

It wasn't always like this. I remembered broken hearts and dreams dashed against the cruel rocks of reality. I remember being lost at sea, tossed by waves of uncertainty while I cling to what hope I had left, my only way to stay afloat while the deep dark sea of life threaten to drag me under. I remember betrayal from trusted friends & family, cutting and ripping like sharp, sharp knives. I remember living in a world so dark I could not see my hand in front of me, never knowing whether I would live to see the first rays of dawn, or would I die, either by own hand or devoured by the cold, cruel world, left an empty shell, neither dead nor truly alive.

How's that for imagery ? Did it work ? Was it compelling ? Hehehe.. No, actually all of the above is true. I once felt like all that.

What's the point then ? If I no longer feel bad then why the nostalgia ? After all the worse is over right ? That's exactly the point. My life has been better lately. But I nearly forgot. Before the storm, there is calm. This is just to remind me of what I might have to go through again, to be ready.

Nothing lasts. Not bad times, not good times. I have to remember that I cannot take things for granted, all those things, material or otherwise, that I enjoy now. Lest they be taken away. Lest they dissapear into thin air. Life being what it is, can do that to me. Must remember.

I guess what I'm trying to remind myself off is that no matter how good things are now, it can go horribly wrong. The night could come back and all those things that I left behind can return to haunt me.

I also have to remember that whatever happens, no matter how bad things get, no matter how pointless life becomes, I still have myself. And that is enough for me to see it through.

After all in life, nothing is permanent.

Here endeth the rambly and rather pointless thought.

Ooh I feel a Buffy quote coming ! :-
_________________
Angelus: Now that's everything, huh? No weapons... No friends... No
hope.

*Buffy closes her eyes and steels herself for whatever's coming.

Angelus: Take all that away... and what's left?

*He draws the sword back and thrusts it directly at her face. With
lightning-fast reflexes she swings up with both arms and catches the
blade between the palms of her hands. She opens her eyes and meets his.

Buffy: Me.
- Becoming Part 2, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
______________

Good night.