Saturday, December 30, 2006

Food Poisoning

I've had a dreadful few days. First, the earthquake near Taiwan ruins my internet connection.

Then, over the last 3 days I had a stomach problem. I think it's food poisoning. My parents think its gastritis, which is very unlikely actually.

Whatever it was, it was very painful. I've not really eaten in the last 72 hours. Fortunately all the pills I've been taking are finally making me feel better.

By the way if anyone has problems burning CDs and if you use Daemon Tools, disable the virtual drive created by Daemon (if any), exit Daemon Tools and restart your computer. That should fix it.

Going out for dinner soon. It's good to finally get some appetite back. Hopefully, I can salvage whatever is left of my week off from work.

Happy New Year!

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Peace on Earth

... and good will to all men.

Christmas is tomorrow. Today is my last day of work for 2006. When I come back to the office, it will be the 1st of January 2007.

It also seems like it's been a very short year.

I hope to have a lazy week off. I would like time to take some time off too, so instead of it blazing by like it has all year I would like time to pass by languidly. You know, like a stream or something. Unfortunately as they say, time waits for no one. Unless you're at the dentist...

It's been a decent enough year. Quiet, with almost no drama (except for that time when the neighbour's house caught fire). On the personal front, it's all quiet as can be observe from the relative lack of introspective ranting here on this blog.

One of the negatives of this year has been the fact that I've drifted away from some of my friends. I've always known that as time goes by, we'd end up going our own ways and doing our own thing. It's just one of those things that you'd think would happen "in the future" instead of now. It's something that you take for granted.

I have many female friends and I feel it most when they marry or get engaged or general become less available. A few of them have done so this last two years especially. Of course I wish them all the success and happiness in the world, but there is that little bit of sadness there. We are still friends of course, but it's not the same anymore.

The same can be said about the guys I used to hang with. It's not the same either.

I guess drifting apart from friends is the one of the less pleasant parts of growing older, one might say.

Anyway, the year ends in 7 days and a new year will emerge. I wish that the new year will bring something new. I wish that in the new year something will happen that will bring back my enthusiasm and spirit so that I may take risks without too much fear of failure.

Above all else, I wish to be happy and content with what I have and what will be. What ever becomes of me, I hope I do not become (more) cynical and jaded. That's one other thing that I didn't like about this year. This year I could sense myself turning colder and colder inside. I hope that there is a way to reverse that and perhaps in the new year, I will find the way.

But that is all for next year. I will mull over it some other time.

For now, it is a time to enjoy and to be grateful for blessings, friends and family. I wish all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Wednesday, December 20, 2006


I was reading some blogs (namely Erna's and Steph's) and came upon a rather interesting meme, which I will do now.

Tagged by : No one in particular.

Layer ONE: On The Outside
Name: Mac
Date of Birth: 14th July
Current Status: Available but inactive
Eye Colour: Brown
Hair Colour: Black
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac: Cancer

Layer TWO: On The Inside
Your Heritage: Iban with Chinese mix
Your Fears: Abandonment
Your Weaknesses: Melancholia, procrastination, forgetfulness
Your Perfect Pizza: Pizza Junction's Hawaiian Chicken - delightful!

Layer THREE: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your First Thoughts When Waking Up: *sigh*
Your Bedtime: Varies very widely, anytime from minight to 8-9 am depending on whether I'm working or not and what shift I'm on when it is a working day.
Your Most Missed Memory: Can't think of any at the moment

Layer FOUR: Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke: Neither
McDonald's or Burger King: BK definitely. Unfortunately, no BK in Kuching! Quick, someone get a franchise going!
Adidas or Nike: Both but Adidas has more tradition and history than Nike
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappucino or Coffee: Tea

Layer FIVE: Do You
Smoke?: Way too much
Curse?: Rarely

Layer SIX: In the Past Month
Drank Alcohol: Yes
Gone to The Mall: Yes
Been on Stage: No
Eaten Sushi: Yes
Dyed your Hair: No

Layer SEVEN: Have you Ever
Played a Stripping Game: Never in my life
Changed Who You Were to Fit in: Unfortunately, I have tried to. Usually, I fail.

Layer EIGHT:
Age you're hoping to get married: 30 Not anytime soon

Layer NINE: In a Girl/Guy
Best Eye Colour: Irrelevant
Best Hair Colour: Dark/Black
Short or Long Hair: Irrelevant

Layer TEN: What Were You Doing
1 minute ago: Doing this meme
1 hour ago: Reading news and blogs
4.5 hours ago: Playing Football Manager 2007
1 month ago: Nothing special
1 year ago: Writing blog posts, playing computer games, working i.e the same thing I'm doing now

Layer ELEVEN: Finish the Sentence
I Love: computer games!
I Feel: numb/disinterested
I Hate: Losing
I Hide: my emotions quite well when I'm out with friends
I Miss: normal 8-5 work days
I Need: to try be more sociable

Layer TWELVE: Tag 5 people
1. Everyone on my Blogroll
2. Everyone on my Livejournal Friends List
3. Everyone who reads this entry
4. None of the above
5. All of the above

Sunday, December 17, 2006

The Seed of Destruction

Some questions are very difficult. They say that honesty is the best policy, but is it really?

If someone was honest to you and tells you that you're doing something wrong, would you listen?

I remember years ago I was in the throes of yet another failed attempt at courtship. Out of frustration, I asked a friend what do I have to do and what am I doing wrong.

She told me I had to figure that out myself.

I was angry at that answer for a good long while, even after I figured out what was wrong (the problem was mostly me and how I conducted myself, by the way)

Suddenly tonight, I'm not so sure if I was justified in my dissatisfaction at such an ambiguous answer.

If she had told me that I was the problem and that I was doing it all wrong, would I have listened to her? Would I have realised the cause of the problem and tried to remedy it?

Honestly, no. I was sure I was doing it right. Or rather, the way I was doing it was the only way I knew how.

Back then I believed that if you're "nice" and "sincere" your "good" qualities would shine through despite your social ineptitude and lack of charm. That and all the other sappy, romantic, idealistic, good-guys-win-in-the-end, chick flick, romance novel bullshit.

Then one day, I woke up and found myself in the Real World(TM). As can be expected, for most part it was already too late by then.

Very recently, one or two things happened that reminded me of what used to be. Certain individuals are shooting themselves in their feet, most likely without their own knowledge.

I felt an urge to say something to "save" them from the regrets that they will inevitably have.

I've decided not to. My ambiguous friend may have been right. Certain things are best left for other people to discover on their own. For their sakes, they'd better get their blinders off fast.

Or find partners that believe in the same things...

I've read many things and heard much advice from people about the ways and means of attraction and courtship. There is something that I've personally noted that never seems to get mentioned.

Sometimes we fail to attract others because we have some unsolved, deep seated, personal issue(s), not because we're "bad" people. It could be any number of things. Low self esteem, lack of confidence, social anxiety, poor body image, emotional problems etc. It doesn't matter what issue it is. These issues manifest themselves in the way we behave and carry ourselves, which usually ends up being very unappealling. Or creepy. Or annoying. Or some other way that is not going to help.

Being "nice" isn't the key and was never the key. Being attractive is. Having good or bad intentions has no bearing on attraction (re: Swaggery Colleague)

It's a point worth remembering I feel, myself included of course.

If you find yourself chasing away every member of the opposite sex that you have ever liked, don't be so quick to blame things on the outside. Look in the mirror and really look.

The problem could be you.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006


I was reading just now about people and their ambitions, aspirations and dreams which they would like to achieve in life.

It suddenly dawned to me that I don't really have any ambitions or dreams to speak of. At least not any more. I want to say my ambition is to travel and see places but am I really up to it?

I've been kind of lucky that at least one of my youthful ambitions have come true, sort of.

I wanted to work with computers. I do work with computers now. I fix and maintain them. I also roll out software and make sure there are no malware or viruses in the network. On a good day, it can be fun. I actually quite enjoy being tech support despite the occasional aggravation caused by clueless users.

My work is the one thing which I wanted and got. The rest are all misses.

I'm not really complaining and I can't say I'm really disappointed. I feel totally indifferent about it actually. But sometimes, I do kind of wished some of the other stuff came true to though. If only, if only.

But they haven't and most of it probably won't come true. I can accept that. Time moves on and I move on with it.

What might be nice to have now is some kind of new aspiration or dream. I think dreams and aspirations are important to have. It drives, provides hope and gives more reason to the things we do. It's always good to have something long term to look forward to.

Like I said I was reading blogs just now and it struck me. What is it that I want out of life? Ten years ago I would have no trouble answering this. This morning, the answer is apparently, I don't know.

I don't know what I want.

I wonder, is my lack of ambition caused by my current general lack of enthusiasm or is my lack of enthusiasm caused by my apparent lack of ambition?

And why do I like to ask these difficult-to-answer questions?

Sometimes I think it's better to be a simple minded person. Things get a lot less complicated.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Three Weeks Left

Finally I can log in and post. Would've posted earlier except yesterday night I was too busy and just now there were people here hanging around in the office.

Well, there's only three weeks left before the end of the year. How fast did this year go by for you? For me, it went by extremely quickly. It's been a very quiet year for me personally. Right now, I'm straining myself trying to think of anything worthy of mention. All I got so far is the fire in June and my new(ish) PC.

Speaking of which, I went to the PIKOM PC fair this weekend. Some very, very tempting deals there. Like a widescreen 19" LCD for a mere RM688/-. I would've bought it if I had less self control. I ended getting what I had originally planned for, a Maxtor 250Gb SATA hard disk and a 1Gb thumbdrive. Very cheap.

Unfortunately, I had failed to check my PC's power supply unit before going out to buy the hard disk. When I arrived home, I found that the power supply unit had no SATA connector. So the hard disk is sitting in my drawer, unused. Fortunately, a colleague of mine happens to have a SATA power convertor that he's not using so I'm taking that of him tomorrow morning.

When I put the hard disk in I will have 450Gb of space in my PC. Should be good enough for at least a year.

I also bought a USB hub. It only cost 8 bucks so I figured what the hell.

Yep, that's about it for any kind of news. Still uneventful here.

So uneventful in fact, on Saturday night an old friend called and when she asked me what's new it took me 10 seconds to think of anything. When I did think of something, it wasn't even about me. It was about my dad's retirement.

I think that about sums up the whole year. Uneventful.

I really hope something happens over Christmas week to spice things up a bit. Doesn't look likely though.

Uneventful or otherwise, 2006 was a kind year for me. A year of stabilization one might say. Also a year of gradual shifting of priorities.

But I think I will reserve this kind of recap in another post, maybe during the final days of the year.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

FM2007 ver. 7.01 Fixed no cd patch (no double transfer fees)

The file can be had from here or here.


Those people who have recently downloaded a Football Manager 2007 7.01 no cd patch from Gameburnworld may notice something odd when they transfer players in and out. The transfer fees get doubled so everything cost twice as it should be.

This is because the patch file is kind of bugged. Anyway I've managed to find another no cd patch that seems to fix this problem. I'm testing it now and so far so good, it seems to work. If it does work as intended, I will post links for download.

People who wish to check it out themselves can check out this thread at the Megagames forums to get a Rapidshare link to it, but please make sure your anti-virus software is up to date as the Megagames website is listed as badware by Google. I didn't get any problems though.

In other news, I've been busier than usual at work. I expect to be even busier today because one of our colleagues is on leave.

Very tired. It's a good thing that I'm off work tomorrow.

I had a brainstorm yesterday and I wanted to post it here. It was a good topic too. I would post it now but I forgot what it was about.

I hate it when that happens.

Lately it's been a struggle to post new entries to be honest. I'm finding myself quite hard pressed to come up with anything personal or original. I don't want to write about what's happening in the world (i.e current issues stuff) because I'm quite sick of that right now.

Suddenly I miss my angst. Actually I don't miss it, but no one can deny that angst provides really good blogging fodder right?

I do sometimes feel like writing about work but I worry that people from work might have found this blog. That would be bad. Or potentially bad. I have a certain persona I use here at work and the last thing I want is for people to find out that I'm not really that person in real life.

Actually, now that I think about it my work face is better than my private life face. At least on the outside.

Very well then I will go now. Perhaps later tonight I will come up with something else.

Monday, December 04, 2006

What I've Been Up To

A friend of ours got married the weekend before last and I didn't even know about it!

So to make up for that we had a little gathering at his house on Saturday. I got quite tipsy with all the whiskey and raspberry vodka. While that was happening, we had another conversation with another friend who is contemplating marriage within the next 18 months.

A whole bunch of people are about to start another part of their lives. They are great people I'm glad for them.

Other than that I had a nice weekend. I watched Click, Cars and Flyboys all in one sitting on Thursday night. All good movies. I liked Cars more than I thought I would. Yesterday I bought a football DVD showing all the goals from the last World Cup. That's the first time I have ever bought a footie video. Rin also bought a footie DVD, a Chelsea season review. We watched that last night. It was great.

Can you believe it? It's December already.

Soon the year will go and soon I will find myself staring at the Monday filled wonder that is January. I don't like January at all. Like I keep saying January feels like it has 31 Mondays in it.

Anyway, I have no big plans for this year. I'm taking some leave over the Christmas period so I'll be off work for a whole week, which I am really looking forward to. Unfortunately, I'm working on New Years' Day so no party for me on the eve.

I actually set out to write an introspective post this morning but I can't think of anything I want to be introspective about. I suppose that's a good thing? I could write a current issues post but I haven't read the news yet. That is definitely a good thing.

I'm hoping this week will be a good one and I'm going to go to a PC Fair this weekend and buy a nice new SATA hard disk. And maybe a thumbdrive.

Am also hoping fervently that December 06 will be a enjoyable, peaceful, quiet month.

I hope you all will have a blessed holiday season too.