Glitches

Is it just me, or has anyone else noticing funny behaviour at Blogger.com for the last two days. It doesn't seem to update immediately now. Now it seems to take around 10 munutes before I see my latest post on the site. Weird.

And speaking if glitches, it seems my car has been delayed. The damned registration is still stuck at our beloved Road Transport Dept. See, I knew it was too good to be true. I'm not even surprised.

Ya see, my life in general is full of things like this. If I want to do something or want to have something, there's always ONE thing that would go wrong. Nothing ever happens as it should in McCity. Sometimes, I feel that the PTB (Powers That Be) are picking on me. Perversely, I can't wait to find out what other parts of my life the PTB will tangle up.

I was reading the comments from my last entry (and as usual, I'm eternally grateful for people who drop by and leave a comment). One that really stood out was Sarah's. The one about me not expressing my affections since 1992. This is true boys & girls. I have not told anyone I loved them since 1992.

It got me thinking, and honestly I was surprised at this too. Well as you can imagine, there are circumstances. I have a post prepared for this but I'm holding on to it while I make sure it says what it should. This issue is a huge deal for me so best be more prepared.

But see, it's not just love it's everything else. Lately, (as in a couple of years already) I haven't been big on the broad range of human emotion thing. I haven't been really happy in a while, nor have I been really pissed off (which is nice). I haven't been blissful and I haven't been depressed either (which is nicer). I'm just....like that. I think I'm dead inside.

I remembered one time, I got rejected (again) by some chick and it hurt. It hurt enough for me to say, "God, please give me a heart of stone so that I don't have to feel all these feelings.". Well, I'm thinking maybe He heard and granted my wish. Either that, or a vengeance demon heard me. So careful what you wish for...

I do wish that I could be more emotional and let myself feel but at the same time I frightened by the idea.

Wanting something and being afraid of it at the same time. That's really stupid, isn't it..?

I'm an idiot.