Monday, April 26, 2004

Changes

Went out with my friend last night. I haven't seen her since December last year, when she got married & I couldn't come to her wedding because I was working and had zero leave left. Went to see my other friend at his stall at Reservoir Park. It was nice. There were more people there than I thouht they would be.

We talked about normal things at first. The weather, work, my hair, my car, the food business etc. You know regular pleasantries talk. And then my friend started to tell me that she had a lot on her mind lately.

Why ? I asked. She said she didn't want to talk about it (sure sign that she in fact, wanted me to prod). So I did.

Turns out that she was kinda dissapointed, among other things. She told me that she had expected things to be different now that she's married. But still she feels exactly the same as before.

This friend of mine, she's kinda emotional and can sometimes have difficulty in expressing herself. But this time, she came up with an explanation all my herself.

Ya see, while she & her husband were dating (and they were for a long, long time) he was often away (he's a cop). And now they're married, he's still away. No difference. Hence everything else is the same too. Like she said the only difference now is that they can sleep together, legally.

I can relate. Here she was doing what most people would think would be a really big deal (it is) and yet after all the hoopla and feel-good vibes go away, she's back to where she was before. The husband not being here doesn't help.

Tonight we went out again. Random drive. It was fun. Tonight she was just bored. We mostly talked about work and what people do when there's nothing to do. No heavy conversation. Didn't feel like she was in the mood. Just wanted to forget and just....drive.

This whole thing goes to show that as far as changes go, getting married isn't as big as some of us might thought.

Still I wish them the best. I'm sure when they got babies, then their lives will change (drastically).

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