Sunday, July 27, 2008


One of the most exasperating things about my job is dealing with people with poor phone manners.

It's incredibly annoying when people call to ask for help but fail to identify themselves and fail to mention what their problem is. When I ask what the problem is, they say something generic and cryptic like, "Oh my computer is down", which could mean anything. So I go and ask,"What do you mean actually, is the computer on? Can you log in?"

The answer? "The computer is down lah. Come and fix it right now!".

See? I ask for more details and they either say something completely unrelated or refuse to say and just ask me to go to see them. This is dumb. We can do most things remotely. We have the tools. There's no need for me to waste time and walk all the way (sometimes it can be very far away).

It's amazing how some people seem to not know how to speak and describe things properly. Maybe they expect as to use telepathy and read their minds. You know because IT department is trained at Hogwarts and we have magical powers like remote sensing and telekinesis and the ability to go back through time to find out what someone did to something like... two weeks ago. (Actually, in certain situations I can find out what happened two weeks ago...).

Sometimes I wish I did have magical powers. That way, I can enchant dumb people and give them a temporary boost in brain power so that they can give me the information I need to actually help them. Or turn them into stone. Whatever.

Sometimes we get calls about stuff that isn't even related to us. Apparently for some people, IT folks have such magicks as to be able to solve all manner of problems.

I realize that not everyone is computer literate and for some people, computer stuff really is like arcane magic but some of stuff I get asked is downright ridiculous. The frigging computer is an electrical appliance people. There's no magic there.

Some people say that computers and technology have a way of turning otherwise normal, intelligent people into gibbering zombies. I can tell you this is true. A person could be lucid and normal one minute but the very moment they are within 6 feet of computer equipment, their brains turn to jelly. Apparently this affects their speech. And hearing. And the ability to understand simple queries. Questions like,"What do you see on your screen?" and "Who is this?/What is your name?"

Maybe it's the radiation from their monitors...

Am I being unreasonable? How can I reasonable be when people insist on being stupid everytime they call IT.

We IT people aren't very popular around here for being asshats and trolls but it's hard not to be when we're surrounded by idiots who can't follow simple instructions and can't describe things properly. Even my otherwise jovial, bubbly female colleague gets pissed off at them.

Maybe it's the chemicals. Or is it just a coincidence that we get the dumbest calls from inside the production floor? The idiocy there can reach epic proportions. I seriously wonder how they manage to work with all those dangerous machines and chemicals without killing themselves.

How hard is it to speak coherently when you are talking on the phone? Very hard apparently.


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